伊丽莎白·西维尔(Eliz.Schaver)即Ho A.Mei,中文名何亚梅。
(原文)
6, 11, 11, Magdeburg, Germany,Heisenkugueg 14.
My dear Dr.,
You, if you ever received these lines, will wonder who I am, that I have the audacity to tackle you.I, an entire stranger and one likely never in hope to meet you personally, unfortunately!Unfortunately, I say, for I feel we are kicked souls.I am nothing to say now I admire & envy you for being called upon to shoulder & fight out China's weakness.I am not a frail woman, were I am man, I would have long since have enlisted under your banner.I have been waiting the waking up of China—my father's country.For years, I have been anticipating these triumphant steps which are now going on, & never ceased to lay forth to my young Chinese officers who serve here a while in the German army, & with whom I have spent many an hour tacking over the present moment, scarcely daring to think it could take place, and here comes the man we were wanting & long needed indeed,Dr.Sun Yat-sen, & we see all China has long ploughed up power & awaiting the signal to burst forth and reap.Let us hope a successful, a heavy & sound harvest.
You will now want naturally to know who is writing these to you, the daughter of a man who lived before China was able to understand him, a man much travelled & learned but unsuccessful in life, after his death, his schemes have been realized,his projects for railroads, iron foundries, arsenals, etc.etc.are now flourishing & those who are reaping now a day, despised him or say his motions theirs.The South China Rail was his idea, the telegraphic line, Hongkong-Canton his work & reaps of other industrial concerns he grounded & earned neither thanks nor honors.He was named Ho Kuan Shan, alias Ho Him Shee, or Ho Amei, & was the founder & director of an insurance Co.in Hongkong & we are related to the Ho's & Wu's.as Hon.Dr.Ho Kai, his brother the Gen.Consul in San Francisco, Wu Ting-Fang, his son C.C.Wu, at this moment in London, you see, all men of education & brains.
I am the offspring of a marriage with an English woman, & have educated in my mother's country, but saw my father and his country often.I finally married in 1883 in Hongkong, & accompanied my husband at Germany—his country.
In 1886, we returned to China, father hoping to at last—after 20 years of work, & open his silver mines round Canton & San Tow Island—it proved a failure.And we returned to Germany, but never ceased to follow & take a mighty great interest in China.(England sorts San Tow into their hands at that sorry period which is called the Boxer Fight & lost all my fortune.)
I am very happy situated here & if I were free to dispose over time and money, would go to China to help my fellow woman.
I hope you'll not stop half ways & recognizing the royal house gives in.It would be such a pity & I fear, never again would there be such a chance offered to make China into a Republic, the only sensible thing nowadays, you have the sympathies of the south & of China entirely on your side, & so many provinces in the hand, don't let Yuan Shi-Kai & the other party win you over.Of course I know you are steadfast, but I pray for God, he led the thousands who have joined your side to keep firm & win the day! I have a grown up son who is to go out, the war over & things quieted, to China, is he once here, you let I'll get a glimpse of my beloved China again.
Do you know—it may interest, you, being a man of reform & education to hear from a “Half-caste” how & what she has had to suffer in her youth—that my whole lender youth was bickered and slighted because my father was—a China man! You, my dear sir, at school, the girls slighted me & taunted me.Grown up & thanks to the political position of my mother's father, associating in society, I was politely received & treated, but there has always a whisper & a shrug of the shoulder, a post of “Ge n'est iais pas”, something you felt, without being able to give it a name.Once an English lad wanted me for his wife, the family was dumbstruck, & sent him off travelling.I never met him again as I went to visit my father & found my good kind life's partner.
I had the honour to dance with the present English King when a mere Prince & a lad of 17 years, why the girls & men looked at me like an animal with 10 heads, the impudence,“an half-caste”! So it was all through my youth, & why? Because China, especially through English eyes, was not looked for as a cultivated civilized state, because the Chinese held hell on risk an astonishing conservation to their tails & long effeminate gowns, which made them ridiculous in the eyes of the Europeans.Because, they closed up their wives, crippled their poor feet, & kept up the polygamie.I could lead daughter of reason in the field, all of which you know, as well as I do.A Chinese was, in the eyes of every English uneducated boy, a coolie—baste! How often have I seen a common sailor kick a respectable Chinese shop keeper, or business trading man, as if it was his right to so do, he, the white man! I hope the Chinese will give the whites all the long years of sufferings back with interest, rather an unchristian rash, but I can't forget my childhood's days.The Germans are sensible & reasonable, they are inquisitive perhaps but not rude, the English are overbearing & ignorant.I am speaking of course, in their respective behavior towards foreigners & Chinese especially.
Another feature—till now, no person of English who would have given his daughter to a Chinese as wife.I will admit the risk was & is still a large one.You never know if the man has not a Chinese wife at home, & in our eyes, a woman is then not legitimately found.Much as I (myself say this)love China & the Chinese, I would not give one of my daughters there.You see the prejudice, fear, call it what you will, is there, even in me, a half Chinese woman.
A pity, as the mixing of the race & blood seems to be an advantage, at least I've been told, might intelligent & handsome men & women have been the result.I am told also that my family 4 girls & 1 son, all healthy well formal & clever, are patterns from a medical point of view.I hope that you will one day receive this, I am sending it to an officer in Berlin, Sing Wang Dok, a Cantonese who some times visits me & knows my brain of thought.God bless you & your work & lead you.As the Republic's head post, you look like a resolute energetic man (to judge from your photo), & I am sure in your hands China would face well, C.C.Wu & his old father—Ting Fang—are able clever men, I guess you know them.I wish I could help you.If your time permits let me know that this bold letter reached you, a card will suffice, but I will go on devouring the daily news & follow your facts and words.
In deep respect & wish all good lucks for your health prosperity.
Yours truly,
Elizabeth Schaver
Ho A.Mei
P.S.Pardon me if here & there I have made a slip.I am so used to writing,asking & thinking in German, living here right on 29 years, English is a luxury for me.
(译文)
德国马格德堡,黑森古格14号,1911年11月6日
尊敬的博士:
如果您收到此信一定会想我是何人,抱歉冒昧与您联系。非常遗憾在我一生中从未与您单独相见。我相信我们有相同的心灵感受。我想说我是多么敬仰和羡慕您被召唤肩负重任,彻底解决中国的衰弱。我不是一个脆弱的女人,如果我是男人的话一定已经加入到您的旗帜之下。我一直在等待我父亲的祖国——中国的觉醒。
多年来,我一直期盼这些现在正在进行的重要的进展,它从不停息地鼓舞一度在德国军队呆过的年轻中国军官。我多次同这些军官谈到目前正在进行的运动,几乎不敢相信它会发生。现在我们向往且需要的人来了——孙逸仙先生。我们看到整个中国长期以来所积聚的能量,等待信号爆发并收获。让我们祈祷一个成功的丰硕的收获。
您一定很想知道是谁在给您写信。我的父亲是何宽山,别名何汉西,或者何梅,是一个旅行过许多地方、有学问、但生活得并不成功的人。他是香港一家保险公司的创办者和经理,修华南铁路也是他的想法,他还创立了香港、广州的电报线,在其他工业方面也有成就。不过,他在世时中国未能够理解他。他设计的铁路、钢铁铸造厂、兵工厂在他去世后很快兴盛起来。父亲获得的既非感谢也非荣誉。那些正坐享其成的人反而看不起他,或者声称他的计划是他们的。我们的家族与何家、伍家有亲缘关系,何启博士的兄弟在旧金山担任领事,伍廷芳的儿子伍朝枢正在伦敦。看,都是受过教育有头脑的人。
我是一个混血儿,母亲是英国人。自小在母亲的国家接受教育,但经常看望父亲和他的国家。1883年在香港结婚后,我随丈夫去了德国。
1886年,我们回到中国。父亲在中国工作了20年,最后的心愿是在广州和汕头岛附近开他的银矿。这事并未成功。于是我们又回到德国,但从未停止关注中国的情况。义和团运动中,汕头落入英国手中,我家失去了所有的财产。
定居于此很愉快,但如有余暇和金钱,我会去中国帮助我的女同胞们。
我希望您不要半途而废向朝廷屈服。这正是中国建立共和国的机会。您已经赢得南方及整个中国的支持,不要让袁世凯或其他党派赢了您。尽管我知道您是强大的,我祈求上帝让成千上万支持您的人保持坚定,打胜仗。我有一个已成年的儿子,准备战争结束事态平息后到中国去,他曾去过中国。您让我可再次看到我可爱的中国了。
有意思的是,作为一个受过教育、主张改革的人,不知您是否听说过“欧亚混血儿”这个词,这就是我青少年时代必须经历的一切。我的青少年时代充满争吵与嘲笑,仅仅因为父亲是中国人。学校里,女生们鄙视和嘲笑我。长大后,多亏了外祖父的社会关系及政治地位,我才被所谓文明的英国社会礼貌地接纳和对待。但总有一些口哨声和肩膀一耸,“我不知道”,一些你感觉得到却无以言状的东西。这对一个内向的女子是天大的刺激。曾有一位英国小伙子想娶我为妻,但遭到他整个家族的反对。他们送他去旅行。从此,我再也没有见过他。后来我去看望父亲时,找到生命中美好的另一半。
我曾有幸和现在的英国国王共舞,当时他只是17岁的王子。然而,那些在场的绅士、淑女却像看一只十头怪兽一样看着我,厚颜无耻,“欧亚混血儿”!这就是我的少年时代。这一切都是为什么?因为中国尤其在英国人的眼中不被看作文明国家,因为中国人对其辫子、女人气的长袍有着令人失望的保守性。这在欧洲人的眼中看起来是荒谬的。因为,中国人关起他们的妻子,弄残她们的双足,坚持一夫多妻制。在这方面可以举出很多理由。在每个受过教育的英国男孩眼中,中国人是一个苦力。我经常看到一个普通的水手踢一个体面的中国店主或商人。好像他有权这样做,因为他是白人!我希望中国能把这么多年所受的苦难不是照原样而是连本带利地还回去,我忘不了我的童年。德国人敏感而明智,他们或许好奇但不粗野;而英国人则自大而无知。当然,我说的是他们各自对待外国人的行为,尤其是中国人。
另外,直到现在,没有一个英国人愿意把女儿嫁给中国人为妻。我得承认这到现在仍是一大冒险之事。您永远也不知道这男人家里是否有一个中国妻子。在我们眼中,这样一个妇女的地位是不合法的。即便像我如此深爱中国及其人民,我不会让我任何一个女儿嫁过去。您看这种偏见或恐惧有多深,不管叫它啥,即便我这样有一半中国血统的妇女也如此。
幸好,种族与血缘的混合似乎是一个优势,至少我被告知,无论男女都可能聪明、漂亮。我也被告知,从医学的角度来看,我家里四个女孩和一个男孩,都健康、正常、聪明。我希望有一天您会收到这封信,我把它给柏林的一个军官,王舵,他是广东人,有时来看我,知道我的想法。愿上帝保佑您和您的事业,引导您。作为共和国的领导人,您看来是一个坚决的有活力的人(从您的相片判断)。我相信在您的手中,中国会变好。伍朝枢和他的老父亲伍廷芳都是很聪明的人,我想您认识他们。我希望能帮助您,如果时间允许请让我知道您收到了这封信。一个卡片就够了。我将通过每天的新闻密切关注您的情况与消息。
致以深深的敬意,祝您身体康健!
伊丽莎白·西维尔
(何亚梅)
附:若信中有出错,请见谅。我在德国生活了29年,已习惯用德语写作、提问与思考,英语对我而言并不常用。